pendylion:
ineedtothinkofatitle:
dear caretakers of children: stop telling kids “I don’t care who started it!”. you’re teaching children to ignore unequal power balances. that leads to legitimate belief in things like reverse racism, misandry, heterophobia, etc. you’re teaching children that it’s wrong to retaliate when they are wronged. “who started it” is very, very relevant.
Also-
Stress the importance of asking your bully why they do things to you and hold them accountable for their answer.
Throughout my years as a child in the American public school system, I had to deal with such apathy and abusive behavior from adults who told me, and I say with no hyperbole or exaggeration, that retaliation against my bully made me as bad as the bully themselves. Going through the “proper channels” of reporting bullying were not only completely ineffective, but labeled you as a “snitch”, “tattle-tail”, or “cry-baby.” As a kid in this kind of environment, I was in no uncertain terms, taught by authority figures and my peers alike, to be apathetic in the face of abuse and violence, to “toughen up”, and that “that’s just how life is, welcome to the real world,” and that reaction to that abuse and the desire to change your situation and the world around you, makes YOU either another bully or target who deserves abuse. Thank god for the couple years of home schooling I went through with my mom and my dad, who (despite any problems we might have) still raised me to be a, you know…decent fucking human being with respect and empathy and love and understanding. Please, hold abusers accountable for their behavior. Stop looking the other way. Teach your kids to DO something in the face of that abuse. They deserve so much better than shit I saw and experienced.
(via spiroandthelacktones)